Pain as tearz sees fit

[tru_pink_tearz]

I NEED My Self Harm
by Natasha Bradley

How many more scars
Are going to come to my skin
Sitting under the stars
As my blade digs in

Sometimes I want to stop
And I climb up a little way
But then I always drop
And now I stay

My arms are already scarred
So I see no reason to give up now
Besides, it would be too hard
And I wouldn’t even know how

But still when I see my body full on
Every single scar, now there’s 273
I know the chance of giving it up has gone
And I hate what I have done to me

And yet I feel I will always
Reach for the blade
When I can’t get through the days
Because I am sad, and so afraid

It’s getting so I can’t hide it
But what else can I do?
When I feel so s h i t
What else can help me through?

I cut and I get release
A few seconds of rest
I need that little bit of peace
That moment is always the best

Maybe one day
Far into the future (if I make it there)
I’ll throw my blades away
And maybe see chances everywhere?

Who knows how it will be
But for now I need the calm
Despite what it does to my body
For now, I NEED my self harm