PEEP THIS AN LEAVE ME SOME FEED IM NEW

[ThE LyRiCaL PrOpHiT]

yo peep this an leave me some feed....

yo if you said i couldnt spit youd be a liar/
but i know you wouldnt cuz im like a young denzel,a man on fire/
mess wit me you shouldnt,cuz to the label i been hired/
but thats the end of that,lets get into a new subject/
i can write text or spit on a track,an the way i switch subjects you gotta love it/
gettin my love cuz you know i deserve it/
im lovin the man above an yes you heard it/
im half man of god half huslta you cant stop it/
but i stand tall so please dont knock it/
i dont have to use punchs every other line/
that makes cats throw up hunches,like can this kid shine?/
well yes i can/
im well dressed 15 lookin like a man/
no chic on this hip ya thats right no dame/
only a fully loaded tech that shine brights its a shame/
cats be walkin down the street/
clip on there waist talkin bout they heat/
then some beef pops off an some kid gets sprayed/
they should turn a new leaf to this biz an start ta pray/

short but to the point thats just showin some of my skill leave me some replies please on what you think thanks

[LowRider]

You need to post feedback on someone elses drop first..
Then copy the URL into your new post.

[ThE LyRiCaL PrOpHiT]

yo i dropped some feed yesterday on 4size an some others but im new an the url thing is confusing can you explain it [/list]

[ThE LyRiCaL PrOpHiT]

heres my url http://hip-hopkings.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=749

[LowRider]

Thats better..

You got some alright punches and metaphors, but its still too a little simple. Look on gettin some multis in there, and uppin the vocab a bit to increase your complexity.
Keep doin your thing.

[ThE LyRiCaL PrOpHiT]

cool thanks

[Stu]

It was okay, nothin brilliant, just need to step up your rhymin etc.
Just keep elevating man.
One